Comments on: The public loner - solitary people are normal too. http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/ Ever the arty Autie Thu, 28 Aug 2008 00:26:04 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.3 By: donna http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-91 donna Sat, 22 Apr 2006 06:32:04 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-91 Yes, we artists tend to be so into creating we don't do life skills well so having a physical map around us to follow is always useful, if not essential. I feel I evolved from Autism into ARTism with the latter merely being a socially more encouraged version of the former but both can be, well, a bit 'different' in the 'functioning department'. I'm also a mad self sacrificer so when I'm not ARTing, I give, often too much. I love having a role, a job, being useful. But I do not like being played for a fool or used. Hence I've learned to give where I'm moved to do so, not because someone feels I'm a leaning post :-) One of the things I learned is the best way to give sometimes is not to give in order that others discover their own resourcefulness, resilience, strengths and to give in a way that promoted empowerment, not dependency. Yes, we artists tend to be so into creating we don’t do life skills well so having a physical map around us to follow is always useful, if not essential.
I feel I evolved from Autism into ARTism with the latter merely being a socially more encouraged version of the former but both can be, well, a bit ‘different’ in the ‘functioning department’. I’m also a mad self sacrificer so when I’m not ARTing, I give, often too much. I love having a role, a job, being useful. But I do not like being played for a fool or used. Hence I’ve learned to give where I’m moved to do so, not because someone feels I’m a leaning post :-) One of the things I learned is the best way to give sometimes is not to give in order that others discover their own resourcefulness, resilience, strengths and to give in a way that promoted empowerment, not dependency.

]]> By: Stuart Vallantine http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-90 Stuart Vallantine Fri, 21 Apr 2006 21:40:07 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-90 C'est Moi! Vraiment! I have just read the Public Loner article, and I couldn't help smiling at most of the characteristics. My line on shopping casually, too is one of "avoid like the plague", unless there is a specific purpose, like art materials or computer peripherials. When I am heavily motivated in something, given the chance, I too would continue, ad infinitum, irrespective of mealtimes, sleep, etc. This goes with designing websites, drawings, computer graphics, or poetry. Living with a dog, bound by routine (bedtimes, walks, food and playing) conspires against this, because he is very good at reminding me of his niceties. As for best friends, I tend not to have best friends in the neurotypical sense of going to the pub after work or watching sports events together. Most of them contacts are through work or groups I'm involved in. Some people regard this as odd, but this is an alliance which has served me well over my last 25 years on this planet. The last sentence seems to be applicable with me and clarifies the bulk of this paragraph. C’est Moi! Vraiment!

I have just read the Public Loner article, and I couldn’t help smiling at most of the characteristics. My line on shopping casually, too is one of “avoid like the plague”, unless there is a specific purpose, like art materials or computer peripherials.

When I am heavily motivated in something, given the chance, I too would continue, ad infinitum, irrespective of mealtimes, sleep, etc. This goes with designing websites, drawings, computer graphics, or poetry. Living with a dog, bound by routine (bedtimes, walks, food and playing) conspires against this, because he is very good at reminding me of his niceties.

As for best friends, I tend not to have best friends in the neurotypical sense of going to the pub after work or watching sports events together. Most of them contacts are through work or groups I’m involved in. Some people regard this as odd, but this is an alliance which has served me well over my last 25 years on this planet. The last sentence seems to be applicable with me and clarifies the bulk of this paragraph.

]]> By: donna http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-18 donna Wed, 22 Mar 2006 11:01:34 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-18 No, Margo is in Everyday Heaven. :-) Donna *) No, Margo is in Everyday Heaven.

:-) Donna *)

]]> By: Bronwyn G http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-17 Bronwyn G Wed, 22 Mar 2006 10:44:17 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-17 I would really love to read Bryn's Redemption. That is so excellent. You will let me know all the juicy-goosy details, won't you? I think the insects are in the poems mainly, but there must be some in real life and among the artworks. Including wichetty grubs. How exciting. Thank you for enlightening me about 'Margo', 'Shaun' and 'Bryn'. Would Margo be in the first book under a different name, or did you not write about her until Everyday Heaven? I would really love to read Bryn’s Redemption.

That is so excellent.

You will let me know all the juicy-goosy details, won’t you?

I think the insects are in the poems mainly, but there must be some in real life and among the artworks. Including wichetty grubs.

How exciting.

Thank you for enlightening me about ‘Margo’, ‘Shaun’ and ‘Bryn’. Would Margo be in the first book under a different name, or did you not write about her until Everyday Heaven?

]]> By: donna http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-16 donna Wed, 22 Mar 2006 10:35:59 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-16 yes, he was at the world congress. Word Tree... nope. Sorry, not me. I'm rather nervous of big gatherings. Tend not to be in them unless 'working'. My version of a crowd is 6 people. I've spoken in front of 3000. That wasn't a crowd, it was a mosaic. Too many people to cognitively conceive of. Insects in Burrinja? I must have a look. 'Margo' was my first female best friend since childhood. She was such a 'sister'. Of course 'Bryn' was the first person 'like me' I ever consciously recognised as being so (he was later dx'd with Aspergers). 'Shaun' was my 'mirror' and the biggest 'crossroad' I ever encountered. What happened there completely altered everything. It turned around everything 180 degrees. It shocks me that he remains to this day one of the people I felt I most 'knew' yet one of the most uninvolved strangers in my life. 'Bryn' has just written his autobiography. It's called 'Bryn's Redemption'. I'm editing it so its not out yet, but keep it in mind. :-) Donna *) yes, he was at the world congress.
Word Tree… nope.
Sorry, not me.
I’m rather nervous of big gatherings.
Tend not to be in them unless ‘working’.
My version of a crowd is 6 people.
I’ve spoken in front of 3000.
That wasn’t a crowd, it was a mosaic.
Too many people to cognitively conceive of.
Insects in Burrinja? I must have a look.
‘Margo’ was my first female best friend since childhood.
She was such a ’sister’.
Of course ‘Bryn’ was the first person ‘like me’ I ever consciously recognised as being so (he was later dx’d with Aspergers).
‘Shaun’ was my ‘mirror’ and the biggest ‘crossroad’ I ever encountered.
What happened there completely altered everything. It turned around everything 180 degrees. It shocks me that he remains to this day one of the people I felt I most ‘knew’ yet one of the most uninvolved strangers in my life.
‘Bryn’ has just written his autobiography. It’s called ‘Bryn’s Redemption’. I’m editing it so its not out yet, but keep it in mind.

:-) Donna *)

]]> By: Bronwyn G http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-15 Bronwyn G Wed, 22 Mar 2006 10:21:39 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-15 Chris is a great character: and a great person. Did he come to the World Autism Congress? If not, what was he doing? And do you ever come to Word Tree poetry readings, because I think I saw you in March and I was too scared to come up and speak to you? I mean really early March, when we were doing things like insects. They're in Burrinja if you didn't know. Monty sounds like a very special cat-person. Lots of cats have had the honourary status of people. Who was your best friend? The guy known as Shaun? Bryn? Chris is a great character: and a great person.

Did he come to the World Autism Congress? If not, what was he doing?

And do you ever come to Word Tree poetry readings, because I think I saw you in March and I was too scared to come up and speak to you? I mean really early March, when we were doing things like insects. They’re in Burrinja if you didn’t know.

Monty sounds like a very special cat-person. Lots of cats have had the honourary status of people.

Who was your best friend? The guy known as Shaun? Bryn?

]]> By: donna http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-14 donna Wed, 22 Mar 2006 09:34:29 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-14 My father, then my best friend, then my cat. Yes, 'my' cat was also 'a person'. He was one of those 'once in a life time' matches. People can have a hundred cats and never meet one who seems to know them and click, person to person. Monty 'knew' me, really really knew me. He was incredibly unusual. He chose me at a cats home, walked around the whole place then jumped into my car. He'd been there 5 years and hence just wandered about with people, but with me, he checked me out as I interacted with all the cats, then kind of made up his mind and wanted me to get him out of there. Aparently he'd never done this. It was like he'd been waiting for me. Anyway, after the first two deaths, he was the closest friend I had. There is actually also a fourth death, an incredibly gutsy highly intuitive 'pixie' who was in her eighties and battled years with cancer. When she met me she stared at me, pointed a finger and said "I see you". She told me she could see I 'sensed' just like she did. She was incredible. Anyway, if you liked the array of characters in my other books, you'll enjoy the collection in Everyday Heaven, one of the most wonderful of which is my husband Chris. My father, then my best friend, then my cat. Yes, ‘my’ cat was also ‘a person’. He was one of those ‘once in a life time’ matches. People can have a hundred cats and never meet one who seems to know them and click, person to person. Monty ‘knew’ me, really really knew me. He was incredibly unusual. He chose me at a cats home, walked around the whole place then jumped into my car. He’d been there 5 years and hence just wandered about with people, but with me, he checked me out as I interacted with all the cats, then kind of made up his mind and wanted me to get him out of there. Aparently he’d never done this. It was like he’d been waiting for me. Anyway, after the first two deaths, he was the closest friend I had. There is actually also a fourth death, an incredibly gutsy highly intuitive ‘pixie’ who was in her eighties and battled years with cancer. When she met me she stared at me, pointed a finger and said “I see you”. She told me she could see I ’sensed’ just like she did. She was incredible. Anyway, if you liked the array of characters in my other books, you’ll enjoy the collection in Everyday Heaven, one of the most wonderful of which is my husband Chris.

]]> By: Bronwyn G http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-13 Bronwyn G Wed, 22 Mar 2006 09:22:40 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-13 Just off the topic for a bit. Who were the three closest people you lost within the timespan of Everyday Heaven? Just off the topic for a bit.

Who were the three closest people you lost within the timespan of Everyday Heaven?

]]> By: donna http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-12 donna Wed, 22 Mar 2006 02:18:56 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-12 Hi Don, yes, I felt I swapped autism for artism. Hence I'm not surprised if artists can relate to me :-) Do have a look at www.auties.org and if you feel you relate to 'autism friendly' then consider listing on there as an artist. :-) Hi Don,

yes, I felt I swapped autism for artism. Hence I’m not surprised if artists can relate to me :-)

Do have a look at http://www.auties.org and if you feel you relate to ‘autism friendly’ then consider listing on there as an artist.

:-)

]]> By: Bronwyn G http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-11 Bronwyn G Wed, 22 Mar 2006 02:18:36 +0000 http://blog.donnawilliams.net/2006/03/20/the-public-loner/#comment-11 They're yummy aren't they? :-) They’re yummy aren’t they? :-)

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