Comments on: Cyber Bully

By: Autism and competition; she just won’t compete! | Donna Williams’ Blog

Tue, 19 Aug 2008 02:18:58 +0000

[…] natural desire to compete. I will defend myself… something bullies, abusers, stalkers and trolls have taught me over many years. But beyond the moment, it’s as if they evaporate. And […]

By: donna

donna — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 08:25:38 +0000

it’s a poem.

By: trista

trista — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 06:45:22 +0000

hii,

who was bullying you?

could, maybe, it partially be?? or every be?? that there was some hard stuff for you to face from the “bully” and maybe it’s easier for you and easier on you to claim “bully!!!” run!.

just playing devils-advocate. a possibility here with what I think?

By: For Sharisa, and anyone else facing attempts at erasure. - Ballastexistenz

For Sharisa, and anyone else facing attempts at erasure. - Ballastexistenz — Sat, 15 Mar 2008 18:12:47 +0000

[…] a similar topic, you might want to read Cyber Bully by Donna Williams, which contains the excellent advice: I don’t know where they get the time. It […]

By: donna

donna — Mon, 28 Jan 2008 00:29:54 +0000

hello funky dagette,
fancy seeing you here.
as for saving the world
I’m sure its saved me more than I’ve saved it
but yeah, I at least try and give as much as my existance takes from this world
I’m almost over my survivor guilt complex
I also think everyone, cyber bullies too
think they’re the good guys.
its all a matter of perspective
I do feel conflict can be constructive
but even in a boxing ring there are the referees rules
for a clean fight
and I wouldn’t throw a punch unless I was certain my sources of info were straight from the person themselves
otherwise I’m shadow boxing
and may well knock myself out

yes, it was fab finding you too oh representative of the Bonnell clan.

By: Sam Doyle

Sam Doyle — Mon, 28 Jan 2008 00:03:56 +0000

To my beautiful cuz,
Who helps to save the world
You are the one of the good guys always remember that!
xxsam

By: donna

donna — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 02:37:10 +0000

‘Sludge’
good term.

There’s a Buddhist saying

‘if you lay with fish, you’ll smell like fish’

I try and remember that.
Most trolls have such entrenched views
that they won’t even hear you
they only hear what confirms the mindset and opinions they’ve already formed.

I think we don’t understand them
so we wrongly presume they are capable of discussion.

Its so hard to hold back and say nothing though
especially when they threaten with shame campaigns and the like.

I try and get on with gardening or art
and remind myself that the online world isn’t the real world at all.

the trick is to limit high expectations of people
that makes it harder to be disappointed.

By: Adrianna

Adrianna — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 02:27:46 +0000

I have had someone issue death threats against me when I was 15 when I write posts in favor of reproductive rights on a political blog. Actually, a couple of people wrote death threats to me.

On that same blog, on that same issue, a lot of people who disagreed with me issued lame attacks on my character, called me rather wretched names, and the usual sludge. One time, I got sick of dealing with one particularly vicious one and wrote something…rather interesting, to say the least. (I will not repeat it here; it’s kind of X-rated.)

But that was the only time I ever “lost it.” Usually, I handled myself very well, and was never nearly as vicious as the trolls.

But yes, the emotions described in the poem are correct and the poem, of course, is very well-written.

And I can’t believe that anyone would insult an autistic child. What a jackass!

By: donna

donna — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 11:26:45 +0000

I’m so sorry to hear that. I don’t know where they get the time. It must rob their own families of quality time. And how can they escape that head space of militancy and hatred to really be accessible as parents, friends, brothers, sisters. In the end, their lives are suffering and they don’t even know it. They put so much passion into their cause in going after people, that it gets like a drug to them, and they are probably as available to their own families as an addict is when having a primary relationship with drugs. So as much as its really scary to find anyone pathologically fixating on me, in the end, whatever discomfort they cause me, I know there’s must be greater. Addiction is incredibly hard to live with and when these people think their addiction is their selfhood, they are far from any place of hope. Number 1 rule, no matter how personal they make it, don’t take it personally.

By: Kathy

Kathy — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 11:18:31 +0000

Yes, Donna I know what you mean. Sometime ago on a blog I had someone attack me, through making a derogatory reference to my “autistic” son. This person did this to upset me, and because he couldn’t refute what I said through fair means..
This blog was one of general discussion, not about autism.
I had on occasion though, mentioned my dear little fella, and the fact that he was autistic..
It was as if someone had punched me in the stomach..
I felt ill.
Put up a “brave face” though..
Didn’t want this nasty person to think that he had affected me.
Didn’t want to give him the satisfaction..
Still hurts though..