Kissing… it can be engulfing, sloppy, overwhelming and messy and even worse if one of the parties has a gut disorder, tooth decay or just doesn’t brush – ew.  And some of us have to warm up to directly confrontational mouth kisses, especially those of us who see faces in pieces or are face blind – ew – that fragmented face comin’ at ya when it hasn’t yet registered fully what or who this belongs to – aik.  And then there’s the lack of simultaneous processing of self and other which women on the spectrum may be familiar with, those non-spectrum guys who think that blank stare that comes with it (also comes with meaning deafness and face blindness) is so cute and open they just walk up and smack a sloppy mouth thing on ya – erk!

So, Chris and I have been married now for 4 years.  At first he had to get around my Exposure Anxiety so all initiating had to come from me or he got the social claustrophobia response.  But post medication for mood, anxiety and compulsive disorders I was relatively tame on the Exposure Anxiety front (you can read that transition in Everyday Heaven).

But skipping to the chase we love to dag about, silliness reigns in the Samuel (my married name) household.  And for some reason Chris did this pucker thing one does when warning ‘oooo’… you know, where you breath in like a vacuum cleaner as you make a soft ‘whoo’ sound.  And there’s me watching, meaning blind, so as an echopraxic from way back I’d mirrored this back before I knew it and then because I like doing the near-far face thing with my man (perceptual play, ask an autie), I honed in on his face as if it were mirror reflection.  What happened?  We ‘suckered’ each other like a pair of dueling vacuum cleaners.  It was hilarious… the vacuum cleaner kiss.

You gotta try it just for a laugh.

Happy dagging,

Donna *)

http://www.donnawilliams.net