Outsiders… there’s those who ‘adhere’… the ‘in crowd’… there’s those who have always been on the peripheries, a satellite, never quite content with what it takes to be ‘the in crowd’,… too solitary, too vigilant, too sensing, too aware, too individual, too real, too deep, too caring, too daggy, too blunt, too raw, too far off the bell curve.

But are outsiders lonely, loners, losers? Are they all geeks, always introverts? Are they really ‘missing out’? I am an outsider. I’ve been included by others many times. I’ve connected well with people in the community, sometimes with neighbors, I’ve been good at connecting others and getting groups started and up and running… but I am not good at adhering. I don’t have a lot of social needs.

When it comes to getting involved and staying involved, I’m cruisey at best, avoidant at worst. But I am not lonely and not nearly as lonely as some I’ve known who are in the ‘in crowd’ where nobody notices. I have been befriended by popular people who ultimately made me their patsy, their mascot, their goose that laid the golden eggs.

Mostly now, I look around and find I am comfortable with my friends, and that largely, they too are all outsiders. They do not cling, have no high expectations, they don’t try and ‘improve me’. They don’t look for ‘what use they can put me to’. They don’t make me feel I’m odd, boring, out of the loop, or left behind. Outsiders are my thing and I am proud to say that outsiders are my disparate tribe. Don’t try and run them down to me. Because that is probably your own discomfort, not mine.

Donna Williams, BA Hons, Dip Ed.
Author, artist,and presenter.
http://www.donnawilliams.net

I acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people as the Traditional Owners of this country throughout Australia, and their connection to land and community.