Vale Polly Samuel (aka ‘Donna Williams’) 1963-2017
Hello world,
Chris Samuel here, Polly’s husband.
It’s my sad duty to tell you that my beautiful wife, Polly Samuel, died on the night of Saturday 22nd April 2017.
She went as she wished, with no pain and in a palliative care ward where the staff were exemplary and acted entirely in accordance with her wishes.  They didn’t bat an eyelid when  we proceeded to have a little party in her room the afternoon of her admission with Easter eggs, raspberry lemonade and even a sip of sake.  They also didn’t ask us to keep the noise down when Polly got us up and singing and dancing to the music we had there. 🙂
Polly’s timing was impeccable, talking to the palliative nurses they told me that had she stayed home she would still have gone at the same time, her body just gave out on her in the end.   I think her vitality and activity meant that a great many people she met couldn’t see that her cancer was progressing, and I know it surprised even staff at the hospital when she went so quickly after arriving.
It goes without saying that I’m sad and I miss her terribly but given her situation I would not have wished anything else than that which happened for her. It was a privilege to be part of it. She had a good death, with life and laughter at the centre of it and one that was just as she wished.
Polly was an amazing person and I don’t think she always realised the profound effect she could have on those she met in a personal capacity.  Many of those who I’ve talked to over the past few days have let me know how she influenced them for the better, without really realising it much of the time.
We were so lucky to have had 7 months of fab time in which to live what felt like 10 years of life, as well as to prepare for this. The fact that death was not taboo in our house and that we talked about so much of what was to come means that I know that this is not the end of my world, just the end of a really wonderful chapter in my life and which will have many echoes in chapters to come.
If you would like to do something in her memory then perhaps you would consider a donation to the Anne McDonald Centre?  Anne was an old friend of ours with CP who having proved in the high court here in the 1970’s that she could communicate despite not being able to speak went on to become an advocate for all the others in her situation.  The AMC lent Polly some communication aids that allowed her to make her wishes known plainly when the ascites were too much for her to be able to speak.
Website: http://www.annemcdonaldcentre.org.au/
Donations: https://www.givenow.com.au/deal
Another cause I know Polly supported was Oxfam Unwrapped.
Website: https://unwrapped.oxfam.org.au/
You could also plant a plant for her & add a bit more colour to the world, as she did when she was here.
Please understand that there is just one of me and many, many, many of you and so if you do reply and send good wishes know that I really appreciate them but I am unlikely to be able to reply to many of you at all, if any. Â Thanks for understanding this.
Now remember to skip & sing & not care what people think about you whilst you do it, and remember that whilst she’s gone physically we carry her in our hearts now.
“Just one step in front of each other, each day. In the end, that is all, we’re expected to take.†– Footsteps of a Nobody
Take care,
Chris
Hello, I read nobody nowhere years ago. It had a deep affect on me. I have visited the website now and again, but not recently. But today, for some reason I did and learned Donna (Polly) had passed away. I am sad for your loss and hope you can take comfort from the fact that Donna’s presence touched me somehow, even though I had never met her. I live in the UK, yet I felt connected. May your God be with you. Hana
Dear Chris,
Thank you for your beautiful post. Enormous hugs from Cape Town across the ocean to you. It is hard to express the knot in my throat, combined with the gratefulness in my heart, but I put something together on my Facebook page. It pales in comparison to what I want to say, but I hope if it is put together with the momentum of all the messages, it will provide some echo of the love we felt for this precious and generous lady. Thank you, to both of you.
Dear Chris
Thank you for sharing this sad news with everybody. Donna was my first introduction to an autistic perspective and has continued to inform me over the years through her books, youtube channel and email.
Thank for you for the contribution you have given the world, truly well above the norm.
Antony x
[…] say pales in comparison to how Chris Samuel wrote about his beloved wife who passed from cancer. His words is found on her website as the final entry. Please read […]
Chris thank you so much for this. I am glad it was as she wanted. My heart does go out to you. If she could mean so much to us, from afar, then I what she meant to you must be so much more. I know she wanted us to remember her through her art, not to be sad, but I am incredibly sad. I did not necessarily contact her often, but she had great impact on my life and over the years, it was soothing knowing she was there at the other end of a computer. I was always surprised how she was happy to respond and connect with me from afar when I reached out for her. I’ll miss the intense intellectual stimulation of her thoughts. I already feel the lose of not having her there, ready to type her honest thoughts. Take care Chris.
Thanks you for this thoughtful message. We need to thank her again for her efforts for the causes including Autism and Oxfam without ego and a constant belief in justice, community service and self-advocacy. She is already missed.
So sorry to hear this, she was inspiring for my professional development
So sorry Chris. My husband passed away in palliative care on march 23/17 I miss him but wouldn’t want him to be in pain anymore. I was so lucky to have had his love and be part f his death. I’m on the eds Facebook page is you just want to share with someone in the same boat
she was a robust spirit with a difficult life, godspeed donna and whatever the afterlife holds for you, i am sure it is about to be disturbed !
I’m sorry to read that. Polly’s books were among the first I read that I related to as an Autistic.
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Thank you.
Judy (An Autism Observer)
When I first met Polly, it felt like spiritual awakening. Her spirit, unconditional love and brutal honesty were hard to bare at times, but always felt right. Needless to say that she helped me change my life to see all beauty. I used to tell her how when I’m not sure, when I need advice and guide, I see her in my thoughts. She doesn’t talk to me, but she lets me feel her energy. And I, in an instant know. I still see her. And she helps me see too!
I didn’t know Donna well at all, but I knew of her through ANI, and she was well respected. She was one of the first autistic people I learned about when discovering autistic community history. Her presence will be/already is greatly missed. Sending love and light to you.
Donna Williams was an amazing, inspirational person and is an amazing inspirational soul. God bless to you Donna, Polly, Carol, Willy and every part of what made you whole. Rest in peace beautiful, inspirational angel.
So sad. Donna, Polly, Carol, Willy and every part of you is beautiful and inspirational. Rest in peace sweet angel.
thank you for sharing and blessing to polly and the entire family. so beautiful.
Thank you Chris for such a wonderful post. I was lucky enough to hear Polly (Donna) speaking about her first book ‘Nobody Nowhere’ with Geraldine Doogue on ‘Life Matters’ on the way to my new job with Disability Services as a ‘Probationary’ Psychologist. I bought the book that weekend and it informed my work with people with Autism, as did her next book ‘Somebody Somewhere’ ,etc, etc. I was lucky enough to hear her speak at conferences over the years and watch her develop into the magnificent, creative and beautiful advocate she became over her life. It’s very sad news that she has passed away but thankyou for letting us all know she did it ‘her way’. Love to you and all your family and friends.
May her soul rest in peace, amen. Love and peace from Pakistan.
So sad to hear that Donna has passed what an amazing person she was.
I met her many years ago when my young son was diagnosed on the spectrum. Her help has helped so many and for that I will be forever grateful.
Donnas help lives on as does her memory.
She lives on in our memory forever and her work remains invaluable to all.
God bless a very special angel xxxx
Been through similar story. Today I am a mother of two beautiful children, one of whom has autism. My own sad childhood diagnosis as a child with autism and beaten by my mom, as well as reading your story made me give my children all that we did not receive from our own parents. Never had the honor to meet you, but you have affected many people’s heart and made many of us not feel alone. I hope you will be proud to hear up there in heaven my son today has almost been cured from his autism thanks to hard fighting. Donna you moved mountains and still does, Love from Sweden <3
[…] minns väl Donna Williams, som tyvärr tragiskt gick bort i bröstcancer förra Ã¥ret. Som liten var hon ocksÃ¥ ekotalare och meningsblind precis som dottern, och vi har haft hennes […]
I just discovered this blog and Polly. I am saddened to hear of her passing 2 years ago. 🙁