At the age of 25 I scored just under 70 on an IQ test.  That’s in the mildly mentally retarded range.  But by then I already spoke 4 languages, could scan volumes of books, play instruments, and could recite back long auditory strings outside of the ability of most humans.

I also already had an honors degree in Sociology, a degree in Linguistics.  So how could I score so low?

In fact my score was incredibly high and incredibly low.  The skills which scored in the high range were apparently off the measurable scale for those tasks, in what I was told was a ‘genius’ range.  But the scores in the low range were so low they were in the impairment range.

So far from being any kind of dull intelligence, it was clear that regardless of an overall low IQ score that in fact I had exceptionally uneven abilities.  So what scored so high and what scored so low.

First, let me take you back in time.  I was heard to do two hours of my grandparents conversation in their voices at the age of 18 months.  At that time, it was considered frightening and my uneducated parents in an era of films like Children of The Damned and Village of The Damned voiced ideas such as being possessed.

I was toilet trained by the age of three and a half.  By age three I could sing ballet symphonies, long auditory strings in series’ of patterns, by people like Tchaikowsky.  By nine I could recite who TV sit coms, most television advertisements and by eleven I could sing in the voice of any singer I heard, I even scared people by singing in men’s voices. By age nine I had self directed chatter which was difficult for others to understand and I think it was a combination of echolalic speech and some key words I’d picked up with meaning.  By age 11 I could string functional sentences together and by age 13 I could speak in extremely lengthy list-style litanies (and then he switched on the light, and then she went to the door, and then she said, get back to your seat, and…).

So clearly there was some exceptional ability to map sound strings.  And perhaps not surprisingly.  Around 30% of the people on my father’s mother’s side of the family are artists, writers and musicians.  One of my cousins plays in the Philharmonic and the uncle who taught him taught himself every instrument, even bagpipes.   So when it came to the test in which I was to listen to progressively longer auditory strings and feed them back, I just went on and on and on reciting them back until the string was so long that Dr Bartak gave up.  Result – beyond the highest possible score for the task.

On the other hand dyslexia and meaning deafness also run on that same side (my father’s mother is the child of first cousins who were, in turn the children of first cousins, so the abilities and disabilities are multiplied) and I was about 90% meaning deaf up to age 9 but by age 11 only 50% meaning deaf and able to move from echolalia to functional speech.  At the age of 9 it was found I could read fluently with no meaning whatsoever and I was taught to retain meaning from reading through its links with gestures.  So in the IQ test it was the reading with meaning test that I failed miserably.  Whilst I can scan read volumes of work, this knowledge can then be triggered out of me but not easily consciously accessed.  I can comprehend vast lists and bullet points.  So when it comes to general reading, the IQ test gave me not lists, not bullet points, not even a text book with ideas I could memorise in list form.  The IQ test gave me pages of a novel to read, a novel in which various characters interacted.  But I’m as unable to retain names in relation to actions as I am face blind.  At the end of reading it all I could do was lists some of the words floating about my head.  I couldn’t retell the meaning of what I’d read.  Result – zero.

I’m face blind, context blind and grew up partially object blind.  I can match a shape and put a puzzle together in no time but can’t easily identify the final picture.  Result – zero.

My IQ score may have ended up in the mildly mentally retarded range but there was no belief at any time that this indicated I was of low intelligence.  The IQ test was clearly biased to people who have never had significant receptive language processing disorders or visual agnosias.  An exceptionally high score does not show uneven abilities and an exceptionally low score wouldn’t either.  In the first case one would be considered ‘gifted’, in the second, globally delayed.  An IQ score of just under 70 is just in the mildly mentally retarded range but if you look closely at what made up that score it was extremely uneven abilities caused by visual and verbal information processing disorders, both of which were separately diagnosed.

  I used to think I was stupid and there are many things which are a struggle.  It’s hard for me to tell a garlic crusher from a can opener.  I sometimes can’t visually recognise my own husband.   I lose the meaning of things I’m not physically using so cooking and running water can be a problem.  There is often no left or right in my world and up and down sometimes tumble too.  I use objects to track my thought externally or have to type it out to experience it after it hits the screen.  I often can’t tell if I like something, whether I’m hungry or whether I had a good day.  But I can do so many things that people really struggle to understand how extremely uneven abilities can occur in the one person.  But in fact, that is the cognitive definition of autism.

And perhaps I’m not alone.  Wendy Lawson, who is diagnosed with Aspergers and spoke by age four, once scored in the mildly mentally retarded range and went on to become a psychologist and social worker.  Temple Grandin, who spoke by age 3 was first diagnosed as brain damaged and has a PhD in engineering and is a world leader in livestock management.

And I have met people with autism with extreme cognitive and sensory perceptual disorders who display degrees of intuition or empathy in their writing, or arts that its clear that IQ has nothing to do with Emotional Intelligence (EI).  I have also met two who were once significantly disabled by sensory perceptual disorders and had learning disabilities who were both working as autism consultants and had deep empathy with those they worked with.

Perhaps the best way to understand this is something I learned from a tree.  The tree was growing on a fence line and had been forced to grow around the wire fence.  I remember feeling that humans who lived with extreme obstacles sometimes did this too.

Donna Williams

http://www.donnawilliams.net