Having a bad day
Donna Williams aged 4
We absolutely need to accept that some people just are rude people and others have bad days where they are rude to people and others have bad moments… and… as long as that rudeness is only 0-3 out of 10, let it slide because you need to spread the sunshine, not the shit…
and if its 3-5 out of 10 then if you know the rest of your day may be ok, let that slide too… because people have a right to be ignorant, grumpy, stupid sometimes and that’s THEIR JOURNEY…
and if its a 6-8 then that’s worth a cry but best to maybe do that in a safe comforting space because yes, the world can be tough and there are days we’ll each meet an arsehole out there and there’s days we’ll be the arsehole out there…
and either way we’ll probably end up feeling bad so at least tomorrow may be better if we work towards improving its chances of being so. And if the bad stuff is 9-10 out of 10 then we pretty much need to get professional help… a mediator, a trusted and BALANCED friend, maybe even a counselor or a cop depending on what happened.
But tomorrow is still another new day, a day where we can try and spread the sunshine or the shit and hopefully we are emotionally wise enough to go for spreading the sunshine… because the shit usually then falls by the wayside and takes care of itself without us watching and fixating on it 🙂
Donna Williams, BA Hons, Dip Ed.
Author, artist, singer-songwriter, screenwriter.
Autism consultant and public speaker.
http://www.myspace.com/nobodynowherethefilm
http://www.donnawilliams.net
http://www.aspinauts.com
I have lately seen a lot of rudeness and seen people be hard to each other, and I feel so lost and lonely in my autism when it happens, it is confusing. It made sense what you wrote, people have bad days, but some people, do they have bad days every day? I guess things like this happen when one is out and about in the world.
the online world is not the real world… out there people use identity like clothing, including rudeness as identity, narcissistic parading as identity etc… then of course it spills over into real life exchanges… where people who got away with being caricatures in the online world then let it pour forth in the real world. I also think we have become more namby pamby seeking to inflate egos and co-dependently soften every ruffled feather which is just as bad. We could all do with a big dose of realness.
Well said… Lovely idea with the 1-10 scale for asshole encounters!
That said, if one’s daily environment is haunted by one or more serious bullies, then the sunshine approach may not work.